Gendered Verbal Communication in Life

I find this subject very interesting in general and although I have observed it before during study in other classes this phenomena is still quite fascinating to me.  One instance in particular that comes to mind when we are talking about feminine speech patterns is the reluctance for the women I know to directly disparage men even when they are upset at them for something specific.  Like recently I was having a conversation with my mother, and she was irritated at my dad because he refuses to vary his "routine" even when it is to accommodate others (when he has agreed to do so).    What I found most interesting is that clearly she was upset and irritated with his behavior but she continued to say it was "interesting" what he was doing.  She would not go so far as to state that it was "stupid" or "irritating" but instead repeatedly used the word "interesting" even though it was clear through her tone of voice and non-verbal cues that she was angry at him and was attempting to vent her displeasure.

I also wanted to talk about something that was discussed in chapter 5 which was the taking of names when we get married.  It's not something many of us think about until it is upon us and that's how it was for me.  I got married when I was 21 and went from being Erin Brady to being Erin Johnson.  It's hard to quantify just how much of your identity comes from your name until it is suddenly different. Men especially don't even really consider it because their names will be the same no matter what happens in their lives.  But men, take a moment to think about this.  You have been signing the same name since you were 5 years old.  It's probably the first thing you learned to write.  Now you have to start thinking of yourself as a different person.  Your name no longer applies to you.   I had to create a new signature, and after 15 years of signing the same name it makes you feel stupid.  Your signature looks suddenly childish, where for years you have been confident with it.  So much goes into a name and I just thought I would mention it for those of you who haven't experienced it yet.  Subsequently I got divorced and had to go to court to request my old name back.  It's kinda crazy the way this whole thing plays out in our worlds.   It's strange that women are expected to change or at least hyphenate their names, but there is no such expectation for men.  I found that interesting when I read about it in the chapter and it caused me to spend some more time thinking about it. As I hope I have done for you now.

I am looking forward to meeting up with the other members of the team at The Gathering Place for lunch and a tour tomorrow about 11:30.   Hope to see you all there!